By the time you file the petition, you have hopefully learned that you are not the problem. During proceedings, however, as you negotiate a child custody agreement and determine how to divide assets and resolve other important issues, your ex might try to pull a few schemes to complicate the process as much as possible.
Communicating with a narcissist can be torturous. They twist your words and often refuse to answer questions. The key to achieving a fair settlement in a divorce is communication. Your ex might try to bait you into arguments, make false accusations against you or do anything necessary to cause delays or to keep you from getting what you need and what you’re entitled to in your divorce. Keep BIFF in mind every time you must discuss a divorce-related issue with your ex.
BIFF stands for: brief, informative, friendly, firm. Your goal is to exhibit these behaviors every time you communicate with your ex regarding child custody, property issues, alimony or any other settlement topic. Keep it short -- the longer you engage in discussion, the more at risk you are for trouble. State necessary information but avoid personal comments. Be non-confrontational but firm. Do not let your ex control the discussion or dissuade you from your goals.
The less you try to handle things on your own when divorcing a narcissist, the better. In fact, you don’t even have to engage in discussion with your ex in court if you don’t want to. You can get an attorney who has experience with high-conflict divorce litigation to act on your behalf during proceedings. It is highly unlikely that your ex will be able to bait your attorney into an emotional meltdown or argument in court. However, that’s probably exactly what he or she will try to do if you try to represent yourself.
It’s wise to speak with a financial adviser when divorcing a narcissist who might try to deceive the court by hiding assets. A forensics accountant can investigate your ex’s financial transactions if you suspect a hidden asset scheme. By relying on a strong support network, you can make sure you receive a fair settlement and establish a custody agreement that protects your children’s interests without letting a narcissistic ex get the better of you in court.
]]>One of the swiftest means of establishing probable cause during a traffic stop is to ask the driver to take a breath test or field sobriety test. There are typically three field tests that police use to ascertain whether a driver is exhibiting signs of intoxication. Such tests include the walk-and-turn test, horizontal gaze nystagmus test and the one-leg stance test.
None of the tests mentioned (including the roadside breath test) are obligatory. You cannot incur any legal or administrative penalty for refusing to take a preliminary alcohol screening test during a traffic stop. If someone has told you that the police can arrest you for refusing a field sobriety or roadside breath test, you have received misinformation.
This does not mean, however, that, if you refuse to take such tests, you will not face arrest for suspected DWI. The officer might establish probable cause some other way, such as discovering an open container of alcohol on the floor of your car. Also, if you refuse to take a preliminary screening test and end up facing DWI charges, prosecutors may try to take advantage of the fact that you refused the tests, as though you had something to hide.
Facing DWI charges in a North Carolina court can be a frightening experience. The more you understand about your rights and the criminal justice system, the less stressful proceedings might be. In some cases, such as if you were driving a commercial vehicle when the police arrested you or if you are a licensed professional, a DWI arrest can have far-reaching implications and may even place your career at risk.
On the bright side, not every DWI case results in a conviction. In fact, a judge dismisses many cases without them ever going to trial. For example, if you have evidence to prove that police officers conducted an unlawful search or did not have probable cause for an arrest, the judge might dismiss your case. Either way, you have the best chance of obtaining a positive outcome by relying on experienced representation during all interactions with the court.
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